I let out quite a chuckle when I saw this picture. I’ve been there and I’ve made that face.
*Disclaimer* This blog is not meant to imply that teachers do not appreciate learning. It is also not intended to imply that we are ‘lazy’, ‘unprofessional’ or the like. We wouldn’t be in education if we didn’t appreciate its value. What we don’t appreciate is receiving the exact same training year after year. That’s not Professional Development. That’s insulting. As far as those looking for examples on what could be done during In-Service, please read my other blog entitled ‘Get on the Bus’. Any and all comments which use bad language, insult another who comments by name calling, etc. will not be posted. *
It got me to thinking…teachers are required to attend Inservice “training” before school. It’s always dreaded and I, personally, would rather have a cavity filled than sit 3 days in a hard wooden chair, rehashing the same things year after year after year after…you get the picture. What if teachers were in change of Inservice? What would we do away with if we could suggest anything and people in charge would listen? Ohhh, the possibilities…..
1. Please do not give us binders full of materials we will probably never use because YOU (the planner) attended a training and decided it was awesome. Honestly, just give us an empty binder. That’s what is going to happen anyway. We listen to your synopsis, trying our best not to roll our eyes or poke the person next to us, and then, when it’s over, in the hidden comfort of our room, we are going to throw away these copies and use the binder. Save a tree. Just give us the binder, say you went to a conference and let’s move on. Time saved: 1 hour.
2. Please do not read your PowerPoint presentation to us. At some point in time, we’ve all proven we are literate. Also, doubly, please do not put said PowerPoint presentation in aforementioned binder we will not use. Just don’t. Time saved: 30 minutes.
3. No, we do not want to change how we teach AGAIN because so and so came out with a new technique which looks familiarly like the one we used several years ago until a new technique came out and we used that. And for goodness sakes, please, please, we don’t need another laminated copy of Bloom’s taxonomy. Nope. Time saved: Up to a day. Literally.
4. I like my coworkers, and heck, I even love some that I’ve known a while, but I don’t want to hold yarn in a shape with them and throw a ball around until it falls through a hole. You REALLY want work place bonding? Break us into groups, give us a list of clues and tell us there’s a pay raise hidden somewhere on campus. Oh yeah, you’ll see some bonding, and some true colors come out. Time saved: 1 hour, We’re bonded and richer
5. What we despise? Really, really loathe. Think-Pair-Share = No. You know what’s going to happen? You think we’re sitting around talking about your binder, and your PowerPoint (in the binder) and how much we loved the yarn activity, when really, we’re talking about where we’re going to for lunch. You can call on us and we’ll make something up on the fly that sounds relevant if you need us to do that. We’re teachers, remember? We are experts of thinking off the cuff. We’re still throwing away your binder, and now we know we’re having Mexican food for lunch. You can’t come. Time saved: 30 minutes.
6. Why ask us what the Campus Mission Statement and goals should be if the Mission Statement and goals have not changed in 20 years? Hand us a copy, we’ll grunt in agreement, and we’re done. Please don’t give us a copy and ask us to Think-Pair-Share with the group about these things. We care about as much as the students care that the floors are waxed. Time saved: At least an hour.
7. We know you want us to get into the groove ASAP with our ISPs and our plans for those in DAEP and ISS. We see we have scheduled ARDs or have paperwork on students that have a BIP. We also need to look at our STAAR scores, but the 411 is that we are A-OK with actually saying the words. Time saved: Not really applicable, but at least everyone can keep up with what’s being said.
And last, but not least…
8. We are not statisticians. Some of us may be able to do statistics under threat, but what we really want to know, in caveman speak even, is ‘You do good’ or ‘You do bad’. That’s it. We are relatively easy to please. Please do not hand us copies of every single test ever taken in the last 15 years and ask us to create and graph the distribution. This is when we suddenly get an ‘urgent’ phone call, or stomach troubles. (By the way, we’re all hanging out in the bathroom, rolling our eyes, heavily sighing, and walking very, very slowly). Time saved: 1 hour
marvelous teacher musings 
This is absolutely hilarious, but true.
Thanks for feeling my pain!
Yes, yes…quadruple yes!!! Loved it!
I love #5! The only positive about beginning of the year inservice is going out to lunch!
…and actually having a lunch “hour!”
Except my last principal liked to turn things into “a working lunch.” So glad he’s/I’m gone!
Can we distribute to all administration everywhere and then they can save planning this idiocy as well.
I was actually wondering if I could get by with making copies for the principal.
If you do that, be sure to put the copies in a binder. Preferably the last binder that s/he gave the teachers at the last inservice.
Administrators are only doing what the district muckety mucks dictate. Distribute to the DISTRICT HQ decisionmakers!!!!!
Beejay, not when the administrator plans every year for the faculty to “entertain” her with a “team skit” to win fake money. And it was expected at least twice a year. It was demoralizing!! Like we were her entertainment for the day. Ridiculous for people with Master’s Degrees to have to dress up and perform for the principal while she judged us.
Yeah but once I became an administrator, I tried really,,, even paid for chair massages myself– and got in trouble for it.. We here you, we remember, we just don’t know how to fix it!!! (I just retired so its safe to say this now!!)
I’m glad I wasn’t in your district! How about learning the difference between “here” and “hear.”
OMG – there are not enough words to describe how much I DESPISE Think Pair Share. And the statistics in a power point make me want to SCREAM. Just let us work in our rooms, have time in the copier room and work with our colleagues who teach the same subject so we can get our lesson plans together. That’s it!!!
Yes!!!!
I truly believe that Think Pair Share is the adult version of getting your annual shots before school. Everyone knows its coming, they’ve convinced you that its necessary, and it hurts one hell of a lot more than just a little “prick”.
Nail on the head, mary beth! I am all for staff develop if we ever actually develop something beside a sore butt and a bored, frustrated self!
Next month will be my “last” preservice. Thanks for making me laugh 🙂
I loved everyone. Been there…done that!!!!!!!
This is possibly the best blog ever! Having just gone through an entire week of Assessment Literacy/Builder Leader training I can attest how true it was. Especially #4 and #5. Excellent job on your well-written and hilarious post (see? That’s timely and specific feedback. Assessment Literacy…gotta love it.)
I’ve been teaching 41 years and the above article is 100% true. So much more could be done and time could be much better spent than the nonsense we are forced to do now.
Retired but still have vivid memories of our staff development trainings! Thanks for allowing me to see the other side of the coin.
What would you like an inservice to look like? We all claim to hate them but what do we offer instead?
1. Practical tried-and-true lesson/unit ideas put together by teachers in a “recipe box” (I’d keep that binder full of paper!) and organized by subject matter.
2. Time to work with colleagues to go over those lesson plans and decide which ones we’ll try and how we can work on them together.
3. Time to collaborate with others in other departments to create new lessons and activities that will be cross-curricular. Then time together to make sure our lessons are scheduled roughly at the same point in the school year so we can make it even more meaningful for the students.
That’s just the top 3 off my head….
I want you, Mjskates, to plan our in-services!
The beginning of the year is so stressful because we want to do things which we know will make for a better year but we have to sit through hours and hours of rhetoric that someone else thinks will make for a better year. Give us some credit!
Love these ideas! Keep going………
How to correctively and effectively deal with student and parent problem behaviors that get in the way of all students learning. Get teachers who can do this effectively to give a panel presentation/question answering. I guarantee that this will be the highlight of the inservice, will last longer than whatever time is scheduled, and will be requested from year to year by all the staff.
See Mary Beth above, she nailed it!! 🙂
giving inservice to the new bies and letting veterans go back to their room and develop well planned lessons or the other work they want us to do for the first 3 days like labeling for readying our room ? I can think of a million things that would be helpful
I agree with this. I have been saying for years that some inservices should only be held for the newbies. I just retired and really feel for my collegues returning next month. They will have a school with about 8 new people and will have to sit through “it” all over again.
🙂
Sent from my iPhone
It’s not just the room now – it’s all the technology. AFTER you get your hardware set up (including monitors, smartboards, keyboards, printers, mouse – how did I have that wiring last year so that my back never needed to be turned to the class but I could still see the monitor?) there are software installs and updates to be done, new toys to install and try out… and then, for those of us who are handy with computers, there are the “help me!” calls from colleagues that need to be answered. THEN we can talk about being ready to do a lesson on Day 1!
Sounds like an administrator to me… How about more time with our teams in the classrooms preparing outstanding and marvelous lessons for our students?
These meetings are where I do my student imitation and break out the cell phone for some texting to my friend assigned to the group across the room and solitaire! This blog is spot on!
The worst ones are held in the cafeteria and we have to sit on tiny little hard, backless seats for hours listening to someone talk over a sound system that is an acoustical nightmare.
Oh my gosh. I had to check to make sure you don’t work at my school!
Been there, done all that, and have the binders to prove them!
To Sue Howe…the most precious gift you can give a teacher at the beginning of the school year is uninterrupted time in their classrooms!!
I totally relate to this as a former teacher, it’s intended to be funny, and it is…. but as a new administrator all I see is, do not, do not, do not. When I practiced classroom management, I knew that in order to see change in students, I needed to explain what I hoped to see from my students, rather than reiterating what I don’t want. I read this article because I want ideas on how to make it better, so, “If Teachers Planned Inservice” what would it look like?
Have four or five veteran teachers offer inservice choices, like breakout sessions. That way, teachers can choose what will be most helpful for them. For example, you might offer: Tips for the New Teacher (how to use the workroom equipment, forms, procedures, etc.), Smartboard Training, Classroom Management, etc. Seriously, take a survey of your teachers and ask them what kind(s) of training they would most benefit from.
The most valued inservice days at our school have become the ones where we run it like a conference or workshop. (1) Solicit meaningful session proposals from the faculty, (2) put together a menu of the sessions that have been approved, and let teachers choose which they want/need to attend, (3) the faculty member who proposed each session leads it (no expensive, generic “outside experts”). We usually have a day cut into 4 “blocks” with 4-6 sessions to choose from in each block of time; teachers have to attend a session each block (4 total), but they are sessions the teacher has chosen.
I’ve taught in-service for the past 8 years. We sing, dance, act our stories and try to think like the age-group kids we teach (PreK-4th). It’s time to think like kids and learn to present in ways that don’t bore. If you think in-service is bad, try train-the-trainer! Same thing every year. i stopped attending 5 years ago.
OMGosh I laughed until I cried!!! I love it and feel your pain. Us too!!! LOL
Great question, Greg “MrE”! Remember Maslow’s Heirarchy of Needs? Well, we need to think of the teacher’s needs. First, teachers should be paid to come in and prep their classroom BEFORE any inservice takes place. That’s what’s on teachers’ minds. (that, and donuts) Next, inservice should be differentiated. For example, brand new teachers need to hear the usual beginning of the year building procedures, etc. Veterans do not. Music, gym, and art teachers don’t care about reading strategies or analysis of test scores. Please don’t make them suffer through it. County or district wide training in a mass venue assumes that every teacher in every school needs to hear the same thing…it’s asinine! As every student has their strengths and weaknesses, so does every teacher. If you want meaningful inservice, give teachers the professional courtesy and control to self-evaluate, and choose professional development that is meaningful to them, personally. So, in conclusion, let teachers prep their rooms, feed them, and let them choose their own PD.
OMG!! I laughed so hard, I almost peed on myself! Everything is so true. Preplanning should be for getting our room and first week ready, then we can have inservices about all the neat things the admin thinks we need to know. We only need a 3 to 4 hour inservice for the new teachers and brush up for us about all the legal stuff! More than that and our brains get mushy and we can’t remember what website and what notebook to look in.
This was laugh out loud funny and so very true! You forgot the part where we all look like we are actively listening and taking notes but we are planning our rooms and/or lesson plans
Loved it! I have often commented that I find it funny all the techniques we are taught as teachers (be engaging, don’t depend on powerpoint, etc.) all get ignored when it becomes an event FOR teachers *sigh*
The best inservice I ever attended was a “Share What Works for Me” workshop. It was great. I got many new ideas and lesson plans that actually worked BECAUSE they were from teachers not administrators.
If specialists ran inservices: “Hi. Here are your schedules, calendars, maps, phone lists and duty rosters. Go work in your rooms. Bye.” Time saved: 3 days.
Somehow, our before school inservice has turned into SEVEN days, with only 2 half days to work in our classrooms. These 2 half days for working only come if we complete the online compliance trainings prior to these days.
Althea, I love it!!!! So very, very, very, very, very true!!!! As a music teacher in an elementary school, I cannot tell you how many “Professional Developments” I have sat through that have virtually nothing to do with me or what I teach. Well, I guess I could tell you, but I just can’t bring myself to think about it. If the classroom teachers are bored (and you know they are — LOL!), take that boredom and multiply by at least 10 (or on a really bad day, 20!), and you will get close to my level of excitement over “Back to School Inservice Days”!!!!!!!!!
After 30 years of “Back to school” in services, this is the first year that I don’t have to suffer through the bull crap! Yes, I said suffer…..what a horrible waste of time! This article should be mandatory for every administrative staff in USA! Great article!
Dusty binders and “what’s in” – “what’s out” trash to prove it! Love this!
The dreaded reading of the power point! I want to run screaming from the room when that starts. I don’t hear anything they say because I’m too busy thinking about how absolutely ridiculous it is that they are reading to me. Besides, I can always go back and read it later if I’m asked a question and give a well thought out answer in the blink of an eye because after 16 years I’ve perfected the vernacular needed to convince any presenter that I know exactly what they are talking about.
Thanks for putting this out there, because we’ve all thought it at one time or another!
Absolutely LOVED this! How universal is this?!?! I literally LOL!
Oh how true, also we are supposed to differentiate instruction, why don’t they.
That same list could have been compiled by students on some of their teachers.
This is pretty much the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen written about Staff Development!!!
Thanks for the posting. My wife is laughing so hard, I think she may have hurt herself. Very timely as she is trying to mentally “gear up” for her required training that starts week after next.
🙂 everyone is thinking it, but YOU said it!
This is a Think-Pair-Share the first day!! Love it!!
One of the best preschool inservices we had was in a rather large auditorium (Civic Center) and bats started swooping down literally on this one lady with a Texas size helmet hairdo and I have never laughed so hard silently, cleansingly and heartily in my life.Stinking awesome!
Did you teach in New Roads?
Just give me the time to set up my room and get ready for Parent Night and call it training.
Hire Kidprov. Problem solved.
http://www.kidprov.com
Updated website coming very soon but you’ll get the idea.
BTW – We call it Bloom’s Taxidermy…
What needs to added here is the part about the staff member who seems to think that every one of her personal issues need to be discussed with the entire group. Like the one who will hold everyone hostage an extra hour at the end of a meeting to discuss the fact that she has an extra two minutes per week of recess duty, and that is “just not fair.”
Love this! Thanks for the smiles & for voicing what the majority of us feel!!
Hilarious — truly LOL! Which, by the way, leads me to #7, to which I can totally relate, especially now that FFT and SLOs will be fully implemented. Of course, we may need some additional training on PARCC, as MSA is being phased out this year. The CCC is another area of concern, particularly its effects on students with IEPs and 504s. However, I am fortunate since, this year, as I am not in a school that will force me to teach SFA. In closing, I would like to wish everyone a very good SY, and don’t forget to join the PTA!
What a bunch of victims you all are! What happened to LEADERSHIP? We are all teacher leaders from day one! You all sound like victims – whiners and complainers!
(I’m sure that ALL of your students are achieving at high levels!) What happened to teachers being LEARNERS committed to collective responsibility and continuous improvement?
As a friend shared recently, ‘”As a team, we became a LEARNING community by knowing each other, then trust is built. First the structure then caring about each other – a cheerleader for each other. We focus on data! We push each other and that makes us all better. Success breeds success!”
I’m wondering about the students who are HOPING for a great teacher in August, one they will remember forever. A teacher who focuses on the greater good and making a difference!
Great leaders are lead learners. Professional Learning is critical. Relationships are crucial. Great leaders are servant leaders. The time is NOW!
I don’t know that I was ever in a beginning of the year teacher meeting where I actually learned something new. It was reading us the binder, making us sign a sheet saying they read the binder, read me the powerpoint, sign a sheet saying I read the powerpoint. Then came the “fun” speaker. During all of this I am trying to think how I am going to write lesson plans for three different subjects, update my webpage, prepare and run off my syllabus, finish painting my room (with me doing the labor and buying the paint), fix everybody’s computer, fight to use the one copier that teachers can access. All of this after spending most of my summer in truly important staff development-learning things I can really use with my kids. This is one of the reasons teaching ceased to be fun and fulfilling and that led to retirement.
Sitting through a power point that you’ve seen before isn’t the way to great servant leadership, nor is demanding it of others. Your team and staff deserve better!
I AM a learner, DR. In fact, I’m such a good learner that I’m able to distinguish between ways of presenting material that will be helpful for me, and ways that are a waste of my learning time.
My “take-away” from this blog is that if you are going to require teachers to attend these days of “training,” then we WANT to learn something. As teachers, we are NOT the leaders of these days, but we SHOULD be, as we’re the ones who know what works best, as others here have discussed. I AM a leader and a learner, so give me something worthy of my time and attention.
As an office staff member….I hate that in the years that my job does not change (Attendance/PEIMS) I am given at least a half hour of each teacher’s time before school starts to explain the same stuff. BUT, in the years that there is a change in protocol or a new software is being used I am told that there is no time in teacher in service to tell them what I need them to know…..we can just wing it and discuss it during our first (of many) unnecessary faculty meetings!!!! UGHHHHH!!!!!!! School starts when??? Yuck, where did my summer go?
(Whining) I just want the time in my room!!
Hi-Larious! This *should* be mandatory reading for any administrator. The sad thing is that in my last school, our teachers *absolutely* did not receive any planning time during the week. Every second of their day was in meetings in contradiction to State law. Administration’s excuse was “well, we’re planning together.” Our teachers had *zero* time to plan; make calls; make copies, etc. Any time before school starts for our teachers to actually *plan*/collaborate and not waste days listening to absolutely useless drivel from people who haven’t been in an actual classroom in years is critical. I’d add to this list: Please don’t use an in service to dramatize/drone on about what an awesome administrator you are/how you (the Admin) personally saved Christmas for a family/lying about what you (Admin) did or didn’t do in front of District personnel. Thanks for the much needed laugh!!!
I’ve been a band teacher for 28 years now….most of the subject matter has NOTHiNG whatsoever to do with instrumental music. I’ve been through every example given above and all I could think of was “If only this or that child had more time to take a band lesson……what results that would bring”. We are involuntarily a waste of tax payers’ money and those of us who feel guilty for it are helpless pawns. But, yeah, the presentation was pretty hilarious but at the same time, spot on!! I wish those who perpetuate this nonsense would take it to heart (or to mind for those without a heart) and stop it asap.
I’ve never responded to a blog before, but HAD to tell you I love this!! I will be sharing it with everyone I know in my ‘think pair share’ group next week– as soon as we decide where we are eating for lunch!! THANK YOU!!!
Been on both sides of this issue. I too have sat through some horrible “inservice”. However, had I not been interested from the beginning of my career to learn everything I could to become a better teacher, I would have been the same sorry teacher that I was in the first year for the balance of my 33 years. Teachers who are too smart to learn will never achieve their obligation to create lifelong learners. Seems like most of the teachers responding have declared themselves experts who have “reached the end of the internet”, know all there is to know about teaching, and just need to be left alone to get their rooms ready. As a former teacher who became an administrator, I worked to create a culture of continuous improvement that was based on the tenets of what is now referred to as a Professional Learning Community. Teachers work together in teams to analyze data, ( more importantly samples of student work) to check for understanding and use it to inform instruction, design lessons, teach them and discuss how effective the lesson was in producing the outcomes targeted in the lesson. Teachers work together demonstrating mutual respect for each other and their ideas. The focus is on student success for all. Not teacher autonomy. Frankly, I think most of the responses here reflect individuals who chose the profession for all of the wrong reasons. It is not about you. It is not about lunch. It is not about decorating your room. I can’t help but wonder if your students don’t react to you the same way you do to new learning! If you think you are too old and too smart to learn new things, you are in the wrong profession. Please retire or resign and find something you can be passionate about. We will all be better served and you will be a happier person. The post by mjskates describes the PLC approach that should be implemented, but there is also a need for time for teachers to learn and add to their toolbox. The world is changing rapidly and the students we serve are changing as well. WE must continue to learn if we are going to be able to serve all of our students.
Well said!!
I don’t think it is a matter that we think we are too old or too smart to learn new things. It is that most of our experience in returning to school inservice has not presented anything new or relevant.
This is exactly the point and meaning. Some folks just need things spelled out for them and/or the read into things that aren’t there. I love learning if its applicable!
Of course I want to learn ways to be a better teacher and gain insight into new techniques or practices.
Of course I want to engage my students, help them succeed, and create dynamic and effective lesson plans so that my school year and theirs runs smoothly, they are prepared for the next step in their educations, and we have some fun along the way.
I am by no means an “expert” who feels she “knows all there is to know about teaching.” My students teach me more every day than I’ve learned in many, many hours of professional development. But what I DO know is that NO amount of handouts stuffed into binders, PowerPoint slides read to me, or ridiculous and demeaning “team building” activities in which I am forced to contort my body into a “human knot” or share with my “elbow partner” about what I just read are going to help me do ANY of the things I need to do to accomplish the goals I have for my students or for myself.
Of course I want to learn, grow and improve. I didn’t spend 9 years earning two degrees and 5 different certifications because I like to sit around and play tiddlywinks. The problem with administrators who think that ANY of those things I listed above or the things pointed out in the original post is, to quote the ever-relevant Coolio, “if they can’t understand, how can they reach me? I guess they can’t/I guess they won’t.” Staff development that lacks engagement and true purpose is wasted time. So instead of being defensive and looking at teachers as whiny brats who just want to go to lunch, how about actually ASKING them what they NEED to have a successful year? And then, implement some changes based on the feedback.
I understand that administrators are often between the proverbial rock and hard place when it comes to information they must cover in meetings and mandates set upon them by the district or state or both. I also know that at some point in their careers, those administrators were teachers. And it is my hope every year that they will remember what it feels like to be a teacher who needs to PREPARE for the actual PEOPLE who will walk into the classroom in 5 days and expect that a LESSON be prepared for them for the next 190 days. Students do not need us to sit on backless benches in the cafeteria writing our mission statement on butcher paper and disaggregating test scores (but that is a whole other post right there). They need to know we are ready for the year and for their needs.
My husband is an engineer who works in the professional world. I asked him if he has ever been given a binder full of handouts, had slides read to him, or been expected to play games during a training. He looked at me and said, “No, my boss respects us too much to do such things. He sees us as equals.” Maybe it’s time some administrators took a page out of that book.
Well said! 😉
Teachers break long text into readable paragraphs.
I love reading everyone’s comments as much as the post!!
Preach it, sister!
This is absolutely hysterical! I laughed until tears were running down my face! Or maybe I was actually crying at the memory of these inservices. Somebody please get this out to the powers that be—-principals, superintendents, school boards, state boards of education. They must allow teachers to use this time in preparation for that new group of children not in useless inservices. And if administrators, etc. do allow the teachers to use this time as they see fit, they may not sneak down the hallways checking that teachers are really using the time effectively! We are adult, well educated, experienced professionals—back off!